Oxygen Masks…Cutting cords


135 Black Women die every day of heart disease.

Scores of  black men women and children are shot yearly by police.

Black Women, Men and Children coexist with systemic racism each day of our lives in America.

Our ancestors were brutalized, terrorized, raped, without consequence.

Some of us are forced to go to schools named after Confederate sadists who raped, tortured, terrorized, whipped, lynched our ancestors.

Brilliant Black women create a Black Lives Matter, The movement is called terrorist by a President.

June 2017…. a jury acquits the police officer who murdered Philando Casile and a group of artists decide to organize a March  in Washington for Racial Justice.  Observent Jewish people…protest because..of the date.  The Observant Jewish people rush to protest.

September 30, 1919 was a horrible day. 237 black men, women and children were lynched. The date of the March for Racial Justice was chosen for many reasons one of them was as as a day of reverence to honor the ancestors of these lost souls, these sharecroppers,  were murdered because they spoke up and requested…just requested their fair share.

Since the election the media has been focused on…

jobs in the rust belt

the opioid addiction in the flyover states

how the Democrats lost poor white voters.

And now…since the KKK rally everyone is focused on educating white people on race relations.

I decided a couple of years ago to stop trying to educate white people and focus on the health, wellness and building support networks for Black women and girls.

With this Charlottesville White Liberal racism exists “awakening”  all kinds of white people from my past have been “reaching out”.

Please stop reaching out.

Your former one black friend cannot be your white guilt eradicator.

I don’t have time to, nor do I want to, take care of your white guilt.

As always…black lives are at stake.

Black communities have always taken care of one another.

Mary McLeod Bethune created a University in order to educate black boys and girls.  She said ” The drums of Africa still beat in my heart. They will not let me rest while there is a single Negro boy or girl without a chance to prove his worth.”

Black Lives Matter.  We are in the 21st century and we STILL have to say it.

If a plane is going to crash, you put your oxygen mask on first.

The expectation for people of color… is for us to just be of service, to educate to help.  Our resources are mined, stolen…appropriated while we are left with nothing.

If white people REALLY want to be allies stop being so fragile around race get over your guilt and take action.

I mean white folks are constantly figuring out how to Hack systems to find efficient ways of doing things and appropriating cultures, why not put your creative intelligence towards learning compassion and authentically disrupting systems of whiteness that oppress the black and brown.

When I see a liberal white person posting something like that stupid Tina Fey cake shit…and laughing about it on social media… I unfriend and block that person.  I have no time for that energy.  You can apologize sure. But I am not your mother’s civil rights activist.  And I am not a christian.  So I’m not gonna internalize the trauma you caused me with your ignorance, pray to “black Jesus” eat something fried get cancer and die before I’m 50 because of all the stress.

Hell no.  I see what you post and cut the chord.   Chord cutting is a powerful practice.  And I’m not gonna lie to you…it’s not easy.  I get tempted to just work with and keep the conversation going…but doing that… I’m missing out healing the wounds within black communities that need to be healed to strengthen us.

No no.  Can’t be distracted.

If a liberal white person is intellectualizing about getting rid of “identity politics” and all focusing on the “real issues”… I cast a protective spell around myself and walk away.

I am not here to support white women who have black husbands or boyfriends with bi-racial children who don’t know how to comb their kids hair.  Do not ask me. And NO I cannot recommend a hairdresser.

I am not here to be the expert on race in a room full of white Americans who have lived in this country and benefitted from systemic whiteness their entire lives.

I am not here to nurture your fragile white ego and prove to white liberals that they aren’t racist.  Why? Because Racism is connected to power and privilege. Even the poorest white person has privilege because of the color of their skin. If a white person cannot even admit that fact…I have no space in my realm for that energy.

I am not that black person.  I do not coddle.  My mission…the people who need my nurturing and compassion…are my fellow African Americans.

135 Black women die of heart disease every day.

My goal is to turn that number….to 0.



P.S. Black Americans are SPECTACULAR  we are of the future and we will always be here.  We know how to not only survive…we thrive.

Just Take in some images of our Black Badassary


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#getfree Challenge June- Anger


Last week I went to a yoga workshop.  The title…Race, Trauma & Well Being: times that call for love led by Angel Kyodo Williams, Hala Khouri, and Kerri Kelly.  Hearing the actual level of wealth inequality between black and white people in America (the numbers are staggering even with Oprah, Beyonce sports and entertainment folks in mind) made me angry. Not just angry…livid.

I already knew the impact of slavery…but seeing those numbers written out… I’ve never actually looked at the numbers….seeing those numbers written out pissed me the fuck off big time.  I had to leave the room and take all my anger and tears and hug a tree.  I cried releasing all that shit into that strong oak so big I couldn’t reach my arms around the entire trunk.

I felt better. But, my anger isn’t gone.

Driving back from North Carolina I ruminated on my anger.  This anger has been ever present in my life and is so clever, if I’m not constantly mindful…it flares up and causes havoc in my life every time.

Being the person who “acts happy” in order to hide the anger is a complete mind fuck on people who come into my life expecting this happy go lucky acquaintance to be something I’m not as a friend.  And even though my anger is not directly aimed at them, friends see the possibility of what the impact could be and back away.

Walking down the street in NYC I put on my gladiator face and imagine myself protected in Armor.

Earbuds in, sunglasses on, face determined, fast pace ignoring all the comments… and stride to where I need to be as fast as I can.  Walking angry that, as a woman alone in this world I must have armor to protect myself to just walk down the fucking street and get to my location unharmed.

I kicked and punched my anger. I danced it in classes and outdoor festivals pounding my joints, I stretched it out in the hardest yoga classes, fought it out in capoiera. Now I walk it, run it, train it in HITT classes.

My physical body seems unharmed but after so many years carrying this weight…my soul is weighed down.

Anger is displaced fear.  Anger is disappointed hope. Anger is a delusion.

At the workshop, it became clear, systemic racism will not end in my lifetime.

Love is a disruptive radical act.

Transformation is hard work and takes mindful effort.

Anger causes me to react and push away everyone who loves me to the point that now, the only person who calls me regularly to see how I am doing…is my Mother.

I am a part of GirlTrek, a national black women’s health movement.  During our trekking season, GirlTrek has a specific monthly challenge.  June’s challenge is to Get Free.

This is the challenge:

#GetFree is GirlTrek’s new Juneteenth tradition that encourages Black women to create their best lives by riding themselves of the things that hold them back and to replace it with 100 miles of walking during the month of June.

This month, I need to become an anger alchemist.

After years of self study, I know and have the tools I need to deal with my anger… now is the time to be disciplined. Now is the time to think before action.  Now is the time to reflect.

The seed of negative action is anger.  For the June GirlTrek #getfree challenge, I am identifying, naming, processing, transforming, and eliminating my anger.

There.  I said it. Now is the time…to just do it and embrace my natural state…joy.





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Warning Label…


I went to see Suzanne Lori Parks play Venus tonight, it’s the story of the South African woman Sarah Baartman who was enslaved by profiteers who exploited her as a side show act because of her, compared to European standards of beauty, large buttocks and genitalia.  The show shines the light on the history of dehumanization, sexualization, medical testing and objectification of the black woman.

It was an intense play.  The audience was beautifully racially mixed.  A white woman sat next to me, perhaps in her 70’s, expensive glasses, tailored clothes, hair slicked back into a severe pony tail hair mostly silver with streaks of black, skin pale, wrinkled.  Sophisticated looking.

She paid no attention as her coat smacked me in the arm as she removed it.  She took over the arm rest.  She stepped on my injured foot  no excuse me or acknowledgement that I was sitting next to her.

I was invisible.

I said nothing moved my body as far away from her as I could,  and I focused on talking to my friend. I let go of all the negative energy that woman brought up in me.  You see, this happens all the time. Many(NOT ALL the friend who came to the show with me is a white woman) white women of all ages in NYC (and other places) just are rude to Black women.  Lacking the basic common courtesy of saying,”hello” or “pardon me”.  They just act as if  black women do not exist.

The first act of the show finishes and it is just brilliant.  Sad.  It shows how white men trick Sarah into the side show and how a white woman who runs the side show takes advantage of Sarah.

The curtain is down, it’s intermission.  I come back with my water and for some reason the older white woman now, wants to talk to me.

She looks down her nose at me through those huge grey round plastic framed glasses, glasses that probably cost $1000 and says,” You know, this is based on a true story.”

“Of course I know it’s a true story.  I read a book about Sara Baartman when I was in High school, many years ago.”

“Well, I was reading the information in the lobby…did you know that…”blah blah blah.  She starts rattling off what she just learned in the lobby as if she’s telling me something I don’t know.  Her tone, so condescending.  Similar to the attitudes of some of the characters we’ve just seen on stage.  I  look straight ahead as she talks.

A plus sized black woman stands up to stretch a few yards down from us.

The white woman sitting next to me says “…and her body was just scientific marvel…  I mean just…well look at that woman you can see …”    I interrupted her  “Don’t.” I said.  I looked right into her eyes beyond those stupid ass glasses. ” Oh well I didn’t mean…”  I turned my head and looked straight ahead. ” Oh well I didn’t mean to offend you.  I’m just saying that that woman’s body is a perfect example of…”   I gave her a look that silenced her immediately.  There was a long pause.  The woman continued, “Well I apologize if I offended you. But I’m simply pointing out the similarity of the woman…”

I turned to her and calmly advised, “It would serve you well to stop talking.  Immediately.”   She looked stunned. I turned my back to her, ending the conversation immediately.  My friend looked at me wanting to say something… I said,” The lighting designer’s use of ….”  I think the woman mumbled something to her husband or friend …I continued my conversation with my friend and then intermission was over and the second act began.

It felt good to not take care of this woman.  You see so often people of color are forced to deal with white people who say offensive things, and we, the people of color are the ones who have to be polite.  Free speech seems to be only for white people and the rest of us, must swallow our free speech in order to make white people comfortable and not hurt their oh so delicate feelings.

Normally I think of the smart thing to say hours or days after something happens.  Tonight, the right words came at the right time and I did not hesitate.  I did not protect this woman, who did not even see me, until she needed someone to soothe her white guilt.  White people in this country are so used to having free speech, and complaining when we the people of color counter their free speech with ours.  Yet they call us “over sensitive”.

For a while now I’ve given no fucks when it comes to my free speech responding to racial bias.  Yes I live in NYC and yes intellectual white liberal racism is huge here.  And I stopped taking care of white people’s feelings and speak my truth.  Let them deal with the consequences.

And it’s not even about me saying anything.  I’ve found the power of dark.  I can give a white person a look that will scare the shit out of them.  If I don’t smile when they make their biased jokes, if I respond to their pretend clueless questions and comments with silence…they become uncomfortable.  When I question their subtle racist comments they have no idea how to deal with conflict.

Ain’t white guilt a bitch?  Well…deal with it.

This black woman is at the point where she has no time to take care of the feelings of fragile white folks.

Grow up and deal with my free speech.



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Soft Enough to Bend and Grow

Photo on 4-16-17 at 4.26 PMFor a long time, without my knowing I was “acting strong”.  Strong because I was raised to be independent in a world where abundance lives in knowing how to connect and be interdependent.  I now, own…my soft.

I’ve come to realize, I’m not that kind of “strong”.   That all knowing, relentless, sassy ass strong. I’m not the kind of strong black woman who doesn’t need anybody….or want.

When I look at the people around me who have wealth, abundance, community,  I notice, no one is telling them to be strong on their own.  No. I see these people… many who happen to be white… connecting, sharing, networking, collaborating, supporting… appropriating.  No white women are going around saying…”I’m a strong White woman”, (they’re too busy knitting pink hats while planning their weddings or baby showers) I do not see any of them encouraging one another to be strong white men or women and make it on their own.  People with abundance of community have support and resources to create legacies and pass whatever they have acquired or learned, on to loved ones. Connections for pre schools, primary schools, high schools, colleges, jobs, relationships…all networks to grow a life.  Many of them enjoy the soft strength of connected being.

I wonder why we encourage African American Women and Girls to be so…strong. Are we growing us to be alone in a world that thrives on interconnection?

Is it an imprint from slavery where a strong field hand could work the fields like a man, cook for the master, and bear 20 strong black babies to be sold for a profit?  Worked until her body broke from all of that strength?

Is it an imprint form the first Civil Rights era where strong black women organized the marches, cooked the food, made the flyers and signs, motivated everyone to show up, crafted the trainings, edited the speeches (for no credit), cared for those who were struck down by bullets and batons and buried their husbands, sons, fathers, uncles and grandsons over and over and over again until her body broke from that strength?

Is it because in this 21st century America, educated, black women with free minds we are considered to be so strong that we support everyone at home and at work until our bodies break from that strength?

Last Monday, was rainy. A super shitty day.  I got up early and was out the door at 5:00am to get to a 6:00 am class at my gym.  Along the way, no less than 3 men asked me for money.  On my way home from the gym along the way about 2 men asked me to buy something from them.  The majority of men who spoke to me that day…asked me to give, buy or take care of them.  I am not that kind of strong.

Did my fore-sisters encourage me to be strong because they knew the nature of many men is to look for the weakness of women to exploit for their own wealth?

I look back at my recent past experiences with relationships and I see how weak I was with the facade of “strong black woman”.  I was too weak to be the one to say tell him it was over when I could feel I was not being loved the way I deserved to be loved.  Because of my weakness within that perceived strength I held on.

I was too weak to say no when my first true love, the love I remember to this day, called me last year to “reconnect” because he was going through a trauma.  I was weak when I drove alone twice to Florida spending months to resurrect a love that died long ago because deep inside of me…I believed and have believed all these years that I was strong enough…to save him. I wasn’t.   I thought that was what strong black women do. We are loyal, we are true. We drive 20 hours to be with the men we are supposed to be with.  We cook, we care, we love, we sex, we share, we give, we give, we give, we give, I gave and gave and gave….and stand here now older with nothing.  We never are…strong enough to save men.

With all that said, I am soft.

I stand here… no I recline here, older…with …wisdom, and compassion.   I reside inside my own mind knowing that I do need. I need companionship. I need love. I need touch. I am soft. I am soft enough to bend and grow with challenges.  I am soft enough to receive. I am soft enough to let go. I am soft enough to move on.

It’s spring here in Brooklyn. I’m noticing vines coming alive.  These vines seem so delicate. In winter they can barely be seen thin lines drawn on brick and stone. But now, the vines awaken and bloom.


My favorites are the Ivy and Wisteria.  Vibrant  green leaves and delicate lavender blooms cascade down vines. Just stunning.  I marvel at their strength.  These vines bend and grow around whatever obstacles appear before them.  The vines are one living organism with many limbs, and when  diverse plants converge they create a network that forms levels strong enough for a body to climb and at the same time shade  a body from sunshine and protect from the rain.
This world is relentless. It seems, being one, standing strong against the wind…well one strong Black woman standing strong against the wind, can be broken in two after so many relentless storms come her way.  But…one soft woman …one soft Black woman… a Black woman who can, be flexible, who can surrender, bend and grow with, around, and through the challenges, while expanding her network with other soft complex beings, who will support her and allow her can thrive in abundance.

I confess..I’ve discovered I’m soft.   I remember the lessons from past relationships.  I forgive those men for what they took from me and yes what I gave was taken believe that…but I…do..not…forget. I NEVER forget.

And when those men appear in my life again, wearing different skin, and they always do appear,…I’m soft enough to see their authentic truth and  move around them, those beautiful obstacles,  and wind myself  around the network of vines who live in mutual respect and support as we grow together.  I am a soft Black woman.  I am soft enough to bend and grow….strong.



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Don’t wait Participate! 4-2-17 NYC Actions


In the spirit of Maxine Waters…speak truth to power.

We live in a society where this is now our reality:



Speak up. Act up. Resist. Rise up. Support and be relentless in radical acts of Self Care.

Here’s a list of diverse actions you can take This WEEK from your couch or actually showing up in person, to be a part of creating the change that you wanna see in this country.


April 3, 2017 REAL POLITICS 101 with NY State Committee Member Ben Yee

Click Here for FB event

For ongoing information on workshops,  please visit: Benjaminyee.com/workshops

This workshop is co-hosted with Hearts Across Queens – a group of concerned Queens residents who came together after the election to advocate for and with vulnerable and marginalized groups in the community – and The New Queens Democrats who encourage and place high demand on progressive values through political processes throughout Queens. Please visit: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1152295071506879/ and https://www.newqueensdems.org/ to learn more.

The systems and procedures that drive democracy are often obscured from the view from the very people it’s meant to serve. This workshop opens up these topics, and others, which are ignored by political science classes, the media and even Wikipedia pages.

We’ll be covering topics such as:

– Political Geography
– The Party Structure in America
– How to engage in the existing system for real effect

This workshop will be lead by Ben Yee. The information he’ll be sharing has enabled him to take on establishment leaders to become the current Secretary of the Manhattan Democratic Party and State Committeeman for the 66th Assembly District.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017  #NoDAPL Wells Fargo Encampment & March on Mayor de Blasio

Click Here for FB Event

Indigenous Peoples and allies will begin an overnight protest encampment at April 5 at 5:30pm. The next morning at April 6 at 9:30am we will march from Wells Fargo to City Hall to call on Mayor de Blasio to divest from Wells Fargo and other banks financing the Dakota Access pipeline, gathering at 10:15am on City Hall’s steps. Gloria Steinem, feminist icon and activist will be speaking on City Hall steps in the morning! Join us at the kick off of the encampment and the march! #DefundDAPL Now!

If you want to join the encampment overnight, please go fill out this form:http://bit.ly/forgowells (please simply hit “going” on this page if you plan to join us for either the kick off on the 5th or the march on the 6th.

We are collectively responding to the #NativeNationsRise call by the Standing Rock Sioux and Indigenous leaders. This is an event to affirm treaty rights and Indigenous self-determination. We’re calling on:
• NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio, as well as Comptroller Stringer, to end the City’s pension fund investments and business with Wells Fargo and other DAPL banks.
• Wells Fargo and the other banks to stop funding oil & gas pipelines such as Dakota Access; Pilgrim Pipelines; Keystone XL; Sabal Trail; Penn East; Trans-Pecos; Access Northeast and many others that destroy Mother Earth.
• We are demonstrating against Wells Fargo and other banks sub-prime rip-offs, foreclosures, financing for private prisons and other practices that plague us all.

The City of Seattle already divested from Wells Fargo over its financing of Dakota Access after the bank defrauded its customers and then blamed its workers. NYC is a major customer for bank services and the NYC pensions funds control $165 billion in investments. Mayor de Blasio and Comptroller Stringer: Divest Now!
#DefundDAPL #NoDAPL #StandWithStandingRock #WaterIsLife#ForgoWells #NativeNationsRise

Indigenous Sponsoring Organizations:
American Indian Law Alliance
American Indian Community House
Seventh Generation Fund for Indigenous Peoples
Tonatierra Community Development Institute
International Indian Treaty Council
Indigenous Values Initiative
NYC Stands with Standing Rock #nodapl

Allied Supporters:
Gloria Steinem, women’s right leader and activist
New York Communities for Change
Peoples Climate Movement NY
Food & Water Watch
Catskill Mountain Keeper
Citizen Action of New York
Sane Energy Project
Sierra Club – Atlantic Chapter
Bronx Climate Justice North
Grassroots Action


April 6, 2017 6-9pm  help  Flip Georgia’s 6th District!! at Party your OSS OFF!!!
Brother Jimmy’s LIVE! @ Union Square
116 E16th St Btw Park Ave & Irving Pl,
New York, New York 10003


Join the Hindsight 2020 team at Brother Jimmy’s BBQ Union Square, Thursday, April 6, for an evening of collective action and drinks. We’ll be fundraising to support Jon Ossoff’s congressional campaign in the upcoming Georgia Special Election.

Tom Price’s confirmation as Secretary of Health and Human Services isn’t good news, but there’s a silver lining: his congressional seat in Georgia’s Sixth District is now empty, and it will be filled by a special election on April 18th. The leading Democratic candidate, Jon Ossoff, stands a good chance of winning the seat, but he needs YOUR help. It might seem strange for a bunch of New Yorkers to be so invested in a congressional race in Georgia, but a victory for Ossoff would not only be a step towards taking back the House: it will also send a signal to lawmakers that the political tides are turning. It’s a close race with consequences far beyond Georgia, and we believe that we can flip the sixth together.

We’re asking every attendee to donate at least $5 to the Ossoff campaign (this is a fundraiser, after all), which you can do at this link: https://secure.actblue.com/contribute/page/170324-ossoff. Please bring your donation receipt, as it will be your entrance ticket. There will be drink specials. Feel free to come and go any time from 6-9 PM.
Can’t attend? You can still help! Share the event with friends and donate to the campaign – every dollar counts.

We know it can be hard to stay engaged and active, and we’re here to help. We’re not experts – we came together as a group of regular people who were scared about the direction in which the country seemed to be moving after the election – but we believe that the power of collective action can make this country more just, equal, and respectful of all. We hope to see you there!


Saturday April 8, 2017 Queens Stands Together Healthcare Town Hall

· Hosted by Ethan Felder
Make the World Youth
92-10 Roosevelt Ave, Jackson Heights,
New York 11372

Let us come together with our neighbors for quality affordable healthcare for all. Our fundamental human right is under attack by powerful forces in Washington. For too many in this borough, quality healthcare has become a privilege for some rather than a right for all. The Queens Solidarity Coalition invites all residents of Queens to this borough-wide series of town halls about the state of our healthcare. In this uncertain time, this is our opportunity to come together once again in solidarity behind#queensvalues.

“Of all the forms of inequality, injustice in health is the most shocking and inhuman”
–Dr. Martin Luther King

Our coalition is growing and will be updated here.

Black Lives Matter, Greater New York
Commission on the Public’s Health System
District Council 37 American Federation of State County and Municipal Employees, AFL-CIO
GrassRoots Action NY
Jews for Racial and Economic Justice
Make the Road NY
Muslims for Progress
New York Immigration Coalition
New York Lawyers for the Public Interest
New York State Nurses Association
New Queens Democrats
Physicians for National Healthcare Program
Queens Connection
Queens Greens
South Asian Fund for Education Scholarship and Training
Urban Justice Center

The organizers of these town halls are:

Ethan Felder, Co-Founder Queens Solidarity Coalition
Dr. Mazeda Uddin, Co-Founder Queens Solidarity Coalition
Travelle Barksdale
Naureen Akhter
Daniella Nanau
Karen Bass
Matthew Mandell
Linda Vandermark

The first town hall in Jackson Heights is walking distance from the Roosevelt Avenue/74th Street Subway Station and the Q33, Q49,Q70,Q47, Q32 and Q53 buses.



Saturday April 8, 2017 La Marcha De Mayo Fundraising Night

Click Here for FB Event

La Marcha De Mayo will be a rally & peaceful protest on May 6th to celebrate immigrants and the Latinx/Hispanic community in the United States and around the world.

Join us for a night of Art + Storytelling + Music to raise funds for La Marcha De Mayo.

La Marcha De Mayo will be a rally & peaceful protest on May 6th to celebrate immigrants and the Latinx/Hispanic community in the United States and around the world.

Art + Food + Drinks will be on sale at the Fundraising Night, which will take place at Creative Chaos (28 Jay St, BK). All proceeds will go toward covering March & Rally expenses. Any leftover funds will go to Mixteca, a non-profit organization that supports & provides services to Latin-American immigrants in New York.

$12 – Get a ticket through Eventbrite here: https://lamarchademayofundraiser.eventbrite.com/

Additional donations welcome!

RSVP to Rally + March: http://bit.ly/2mrvIJa
Twitter: @LaMarchaDeMayo
Info & Donations: lamarchademayo.com
Food for the Fundraising Night will be provided by:

Drinks and snacks by:
Jorge Guzman, GM & Mixologist at several prestigious New York restaurants. Jorge Guzman was born in the Dominican Republic and grew up in and around his father’s hotel, restaurant and discotheque businesses. Jorge is one of New York’s leading entrepreneurial representatives for the cause of Latin influenced cuisine and mixology. His restaurants support creative ideas & the community.

Check out Jorge’s restaurants here:
Black Ant
Ofrenda NYC
El Temerario
La mano


See you there

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I am not Your Work Horse.


Artwork by timokamura.com

African American women are more than just “strong”.  Our very existence is a miracle.

I’ve always known true American history.  My grandfather, a sharecropper from Kingstree, South Carolina told me stories about black people being lynched, their dead bodies fed to hogs cousins raped by white men and black men being sent up north to have the babies and sending the children back to be raised by Aunties, Sisters, Mothers, and Grandmothers when I was 5 years old.

African Americans have lived the trauma for over 450 years here in America.

There were 12 generations of slavery before reconstruction.  Think about that.  12 generations. Think of the toll on the enslaved women from Africa.

Documentaries like “13th”  and “I am not your Negro”  books like  “The New Jim Crow” have awakened those who have been living their lives bathed in a happy ignorance of America.

When newly “woke” folks ask me if I’ve seen or read any of these fantastic works of art… I smile.  Yes, I’ve seen the movies, no I haven’t read the books…why…because I’ve lived it.

All I have to do is look at the images of black people in our media and I can see it.

What struck me about the documentary “I am Not your Negro” was how brilliant James Baldwin was and the clarity he had as an outsider in the African American community.

What will live with me  from the documentary “I am Not your Negro” is the fact that everything comes…with a cost.  The American Dream of white picket fences…came with a price.

Seeing images of Doris Day and the white picket fence against sharecroppers shacks and black women and men’s lynched bodies hanging like strange fruit in poplar trees, images of enslaved Africans serving white masters…Native Americans being slaughtered as their land is stolen from them…free labor, lies, theft and oppression built the America that wants to be so great again.

I’ve always said I am NOT leaving this country…this country built upon and with the blood of my ancestors.  James Baldwin came back after seeing images of 15 year old Hazel Massery who walked alone through the hundreds of screaming mostly white boys and men who spat on her as she walked to go to school.  And what those disgusting white people did to her once she was inside the schoolhouse…alone with them was equally vile.

Baldwin came back, ashamed he was not there to stand with her.  The civil rights movement sent Black women and Girls onto the front lines to be slaughtered and we would NOT have the level of freedom we have today, if it were not for their sacrifice.

I particularly honor the African American Women who continue to thrive and shine regardless of what is going on in the world.

African American Woman has ALWAYS been connected to making America fair and just for us. Remember, three  African American women started the Black Lives Matter movement. Black women from the WNBA began the Black Lives Matter protests on the basketball court that Black Male athletes continued in 2016.  How do we survive when everything is always taken from us?

We remain determined.  When I saw the photos of  Myrile Evers-Williams, (Medgar Evers wife), Corretta Scott King and Betty Shabazz  with their husbands and families…my heart broke.

They were all so so young.

America…is hazardous to the African American’s lifespan.
So…as people who have abundance try to suck me dry…asking me to do, to be, to give when I struggle to care for my own single self I remember the strength of my foremothers and I take my individual self care seriously.  The biggest boldest thing I can do on this planet as an African American woman… IS LIVE for a LONG ASS TIME.

I will not buy into everything that America offers that will kill me.  I see this country clearly for what it is.

The strategy of making African American women the floor mat of the country, has never been the actual truth of reality.

I am an African-American woman born of this country.  I am not an immigrant, my blood is the foundation of building this nation and this cannot be denied.

My backbone is steel, my soul is drenched in honey, and yes… I am strong and I am soft and…I am not your work horse.

I am a queen.


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A lesson: Christianity, Paganism & Beyoncé


Photo from US magazine

Okay, so…some rabid Christian woman that Beyonce’s performance was sinful on a thread that called Beyonce’s performance “stunning calling Beyonce’s performance Sinful…

So I chose to write this:
Stunning. Those who don’t understand, it’s sad. What the ignorant call “sin” is actually the basis of Christianity. Christianity’s foundation is…pagan ritual. When the Roman empire would conquer a nation, they would not force the nation to take on the Roman religion, each culture was allowed to keep it’s own religion.

That was until the Christian sect came along.

Then about 300 years after Jesus Christ died, the Roman Emperor Constantine, merged the earth based pagan religions with Christianity in an attempt to keep the decaying Roman empire together under one religion. That’s why there are Christmas trees, and rabbits with chocolate eggs at Easter…and all the traditions of Christianity…and the Mother Mary…is the goddess Yemaya who is also the Celtic goddess Danu,(Celts..The UK, Ireland etc) who is also the Greek goddess Gaia, who is the roman goddess Hera who is the Lakota goddess Wohpe (Native American tribe)…who the Catholic church, which is the basis of all modern Christian religions, attempted to wipe from the planet.

But monotheism tore Rome apart and the Catholic church brought in the reformation, the dark ages. Offshoots of this Church collaborated to create systems to break down the African continent, tribe by tribe through slavery, colonialism and stealing land and resources sponsored by Christianity. Christians transported their dysfunction to what they called the new world and fucked up the Indigenous American tribes as well.

Religions run by men, supported by brainwashed women. Who kill in the name of Christ. Who manipulate the masses for cash and who live like kings judging everyone from their super churches with their airplanes and fancy homes.

Religions who demean women and attempt to subjugate us.

When women dance…share our voices…find ways to honor the divine feminine …moving our hips…being in our bodies..not for the pleasure of men…no… just to embrace our natural state of joy…it’s called sin.

I pity those who don’t understand and are so so stuck, so domesticated, such sheep…living your lives in straight lines, complaining about the present, hoping for a paradise elsewhere…while you miss the beauty and joy…the paradise that already lies within you.

Ah well.

Live in your ignorance, it’s your loss.

Those of us who do understand…have compassion for you.

And Beyonce….is in her flow, in her glow…shining her light BRIGHT and those of us who understand know she doesn’t think she’s a God… she’s an artist connected to the past leaving a legacy that will keep our traditions alive.





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